HOW TO START YOUR DAY WITH A POSITIVE OUTLOOK!!!!!!!

1. Open a new file in your PC .

2! . Name it " Boss "

3. Send it to the RECYCLE BIN

4. Empty the RECYCLE BIN

5. Your PC will ask you, "Are you sure you want to delete Boss permanently?"

6. Answer calmly, "Yes," and press the mouse button firmly....

7. Feel better?



HAVE A NICE DAY



If u dont like any of my posts and dont like 2 read then or if my posts disturb u ,thn plz dont hesistate feel free to....throw ur PC out

Absolutely brilliant lady

A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods.
She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.

The frog said to her, 'If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes.'
The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, 'Thank you, but I failed to mention
that there was a condition to your wishes.

Whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times of it!' The woman said, 'That's okay.'

For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.
The frog warned her, 'You do realize that this
wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis
whom women will flock to'. The woman replied, 'That's okay, because I will
be the most beautiful woman and he will have eyes only for me.'
So, KAZAM-
she's the most beautiful Woman in the world!

For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world.
The frog said, 'That will make your husband the richest man in the world.
And he will be ten times richer than you. '
The woman said, 'That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine.'
So, KAZAM- she's the richest woman in the world!

The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, 'I'd like to have a
mild heart attack.'

Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't
mess with them.

Attention
female readers:
This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue
feeling good!

Male
readers: Please scroll down.






























The man had a heart attack ten times
'milder' than his wife!!!

Moral of the story : Women are really dumb but think they're really smart .

Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show

PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!

Cleverest Female Joke

It has long been contended that there are male jokes and there are female jokes. And there are unisex jokes. Here is a joke I consider a true female joke. I offer it to you in the hopes that women will loveit and men will pass it along to a woman who will love it.

A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after work cocktail with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy middle-aged man entered.

He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes off him.

The young-at-heart man noticed her overly attentive stare and walked directly toward her. (As all men will.)

Before she could offer her apologies for so rudely staring, he leaned over and whispered to her, "I'll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $20.00...... on one condition." (There are always conditions)

Flabbergasted, the woman asked what the condition was. The man replied, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words." (controlling huh?)

The woman considered his proposition for a moment, then slowly removed a $20 bill from her purse, which she pressed into the man's hand along with her address.

She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly, and meaningfully said....(scroll down)
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"Clean my house."
(GREAT WAY TO GO GIRL!!! )
_________________
A little bit of powder, a little bit of paint, makes a girl's complexion seem what it ain't

Have a Nice Day

-

షరతుల పెళ్ళికొడుకులు -- In Telugu

గమనిక: ఓ పేరుగాంచిన పెళ్ళిసంబంధాల వెబ్ సైట్లో కొన్ని తమాషా ప్రకటనలు ఇవి.  

ఇలా ప్రకటనలివ్వగలిగిన వారి ధైర్యానికి జోహార్లు చెప్పుకుంటూ,  

హృదయాంతరాళాల్లోంచి వచ్చిన మాటలు కాబట్టి స్పెల్లింగులు, వ్యాకరణం పట్టించుకోకుండా విషయం చదవండి. ఇవెవర్నీ కించపరచటానిక్కాదు, సరదాగా నవ్వుకోండి అంతే.
*************
I want very simple girl. from brahmin educated family from orissa state. he is also know about
RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other Homework.
వీడి ధైర్యం దొంగలెత్తుకెళ్ళ. రామాయణం, గీత చదివి వినిపించింది చాలక, అంట్లు కూడా కడుగే అమ్మాయి కావాలి అని నైసుగా "హోం వర్క్" అంటున్నాడు.

ఏ సంధ్య గారో, పుణ్యవతి గారో చూస్తే వీడి గతేం కాను?  ఆ మాట కొస్తే మన బ్లాగ్వనితల పాల్పడినా వీడి పని అంతే  
Wants a woman who knows me better and can adjust with me forever.

She may never create any difficulties in my life or her life by which the entire life can run smoothly.

thank you
వీడు సరేసరి, నేను మారేది లేదు, నన్ను జీవితాంతం సర్దుకు పోయే అమ్మాయి కావాలని ఇప్పుడే ఘంటాపదంగా చెబుతున్నాడు.

అంతటితో ఆగాడా, ఉహూ, తనకే కష్టం కలిగించగూడదుట, మరి వీడి సంగతో? వీడి ప్రకటన వీడి మెడకి తగిలించి, కోఠీ ఉమెన్స్ కాలేజీ ముందు నిలబెడితే వీడి పరిస్థితేమిటా అని ఆలోచిస్తున్నా…
She should be good looking and should have a service.

She Shoulsd have one brother and one sister.

She should be educated.
అందగత్తెట, సరే ఒప్పుకుంటాం కానీ మళ్ళీ వీడు సర్వీస్ అంటున్నాడు.

ఇదీ అంట్లు తోమే పని కాదు గదా? భలే పదాలు కనిపెడుతున్నారే. సరే అదీ సర్దుకుపోయే అమ్మాయి దొరికిందనుకో, మళ్ళీ ఒక్క తమ్ముడు, ఒక్క చెల్లెలే ఉండాలిట.

ఇదెక్కడి ఫిట్టింగు? పోనీలెండి , నేను అమ్మాయి తరఫు మరో ఇద్దరిని పోషిస్తా అంటున్నాడేమో. ఏమో నమ్మేట్టులేదు, వాళ్ళిద్దర్నీ పన్లో అదే సర్వీస్లో పెడతాడేమో? మరిచా, చివర్లో చదువుకున్నదయి ఉండాలంటున్నాడోచ్!
I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Becauese friendship is a first step of love.

I am looking for my dreamgirl who will love me more than i. Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on …….. hold my hand forever !!!
స్నేహం ప్రేమకి పునాది తో మొదలెట్టాడు. అనుమానం లేదు, వీడు "దిల్వాలే దులహనియా లేజాయేంగే" ఓ పది సార్లు చూసుంటాడు.
i am simple boy.I have lot of problem in mylife because of my luck.

now i am looking one girl. she care me and love me lot lot lot.
వీడు భలేగా నచ్చాడు నాకు, వీడి ధైర్యానికి. బహుశా "కార్యేషు దాసీ…" బాగా వంటపట్టించుకున్నట్లున్నాడు.

నేను కష్టాల్లో మునిగున్నాను, వచ్చి నాకు సేవలు చేసి తరించమని నిర్భయంగా చెబుతున్నాడు.  వీణ్ణి గానీ మన తెలంగాణా శకుంతల చూస్తే, పిచ్చకొట్టుడే  
My wife should be as 'Parwati' as in Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki and as Tulsi as in KSBKBT……
ఇహ వీడి గురించేమని చెప్పను. వీడు నేరుగా స్పెక్స్ (Specifications) ఇచ్చేశాడు.

ఈ ధారావాహికాలు నేను చూడలేదుగానీ, పార్వతీ దేవి మరియు తులసమ్మ (తులసి చెట్టు) కంటే గొప్పవాళ్ళు కాదనుకుంటా. వీడు నిజంగా గుండెలు తీసిన బంటే!
i want a girl with no drinks if she wants she can wear jeans in house but while steping out of house she should give recpect to our cast.
ఈ ప్రబుద్ధుడి కోరికలు విని నా గొంతు మూగపోయి మాటలు రావట్లా. గర్ల్ విత్ నో డ్రింక్సా, అదేదో వాటర్ విత్ నో అయిస్ లాగా.  

బాగా జాలిగుండె కాబోలు,  ఇంట్లో జీన్స్ వేసుకోనిస్తాట్ట, కానీ కులానికి మర్యాదివ్వకపోతే, ఖబడ్దార్ అంటున్నాడు. అమ్మో, తేనె పూసిన కత్తే వీడు.


HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING GUY,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH.
I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD.

THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A GIRL ,THEY ARE
1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.
2.THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION
3.SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.
వీడు మొదలెట్టటమే కాపిటల్ లెట్టర్స్లో. అంటే, ఒళ్ళు దగ్గరపెట్టి చదవమంటున్నాడు. చచ్చింది గొర్రె.

వీడు అందగాడుట, సరే. అందర్నీ నవ్వించగలట్ట, అబ్బో కళాకారుడే. దేవుణ్ణి నమ్ముతాట్ట. మంచి లక్షణమయినవాడికి మల్లేనే ఉన్నాడు కదా.

ఆగండి మరి.. వీడు ఓ మూడు షరతులు పెట్టాడండీ అమ్మాయికి.

అమ్మాయి కూడా దేవుణ్ణి నమ్మాలిట, బాగుంది.

వీడి వృత్తిని అమ్మాయి ఇష్టపడాలిట.

వీడు నవ్వించే ప్రయత్నం చేస్తుంటే బోర్ గా ఫీల్ అవకూడదుట.

అంటే, నిర్భంధించి నవ్విస్తాడా? ఏమో? ఇప్పుడు నాకు నిజంగానే నవ్వొస్తోంది  
whatever she may be but she should feel that she is going to be someone bride and she must think of the future life if she is toolike this she would bde called the lady of the lamp
ఆమె ఎవరైతే నాకేమిటి, తను ఒకడి భార్య కాబోతోందని గుర్తుపెట్టుకోవాలని హెచ్చరికతో మొదలెట్టాడు వీడు.

అంతే, ఆ తర్వాత ఈ అర్భకుడికి వీడు చెప్పిన ఒక్క ముక్క అర్థం కాలా. మీకేమైనా తెలిస్తే చెప్పండి, ప్లీజ్…  
my name is xxxxx and i am unmarried. please you marrige me pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes
వీడి పెళ్ళికోసం ఏమైనా చేసేట్టున్నాడు. ఛీ, పెళ్ళి కోసం ఇంతగా మొహం వాచిన వెధవని ఇప్పటిదాకా చూళ్ళా.

మగవాళ్ళ పరువు ఇంతగా తీసిన వీడికి ఇదే నా శాపం. ఓ చితక్కొట్టుడు పెళ్ళాంతో వీడికి పెళ్ళి అవుగాక!   అయిదేళ్ళ తర్వాత శాపవిముక్తి.
iam xxxx my family histoy my two brother two sister and fater & mother sister completely marred
పూర్తిగా పెళ్ళిచేసుకోవటమా? అంటే సగం పెళ్ళి అని ఒకటుందా?ఎప్పుడూ వినలేదే?  
hello i am a good charactarised man. i want to run my life happily.
i divorced my first wife.her charactor is not good'.

i expect the good minded and clean habits girl who may be in the same
caste or other caste accepted ..
వీడు మరీ నిజాయితీగా నటిద్దామని, చెప్పకూడనివి కూడా చెప్పేసినట్లున్నాడు.  

వీడి నిజాయితీ ఏడ్చినట్టే ఉంది. త్రేతాయుగంలో సీతని అనుమానించిన దేవుడైన రాముణ్ణి ఇప్పటికీ ఆడవాళ్ళు క్షమించట్లా.

వీడు పాత భార్య మీద అభాండం వేస్తూ, కొత్త భార్యని వెదుకుతున్నాడు. వీణ్ణి నమ్ముతారంటారా?  


i am little fair indian colour. i don't have any habit.

i do exercise and health person.looking good girl. should maintain house well.
పాపం, వీడి ఉద్ధేశ్యం దురలవాట్లేమి లేవని కాబోలు!   
iam xxxx. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was marred.
వీడెంత ముదురు అంటే, నాకు అమ్మాయి కావాలి అని కూడా అడగట్ట.  బాగా సేఫ్ గా ఆడుతున్నాడు.  
I want one girl who love me or my mother. she love me heartly or she havea frank she's skin colour 'normal'not a black or not a whitey.

I Think the main think is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are beautiful. but iam not a handsome person or not a good looking.

but my Mom say that Iam a good person.  iam "Aeklauta". The choice is your. bye bye.
వీడెవడో కాస్త ఉత్తమ పురుషుడల్లే ఉన్నాడు. కాకపోతే, వీడు అమ్మకూచి అనుకుంటా.
hi iam very cool nauther ok my hobby is see t.v. and news ok i have 1 car and 1 bowl ok my mother also good ok my faruet world is ok
వీడు అన్నీ ఓకే ఓకే అంటున్నాడు ఏమిటో..

ఒక కారు అన్నాడు బాగుంది, కానీ ఒక చిప్ప అని కూడా అంటున్నాడు దరిద్రంగా.

ఏమిటో వీడి గొడవ… కొంపదీసి బంగళా అనా వాడి ఉద్దేశ్యం? అమ్మో, ఇంతకు మించి అనువదించుకోటం నా వల్ల కాదు కుర్రోయ్..  
i love my patner ok i marriage the patner ok i search my patner ok and i love the patner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate ok  
వీడింకో ఓకే బాబు. నేను ప్రేమిస్తా, నేను వెతుక్కుంటా, నేను ప్రేమిస్తా సరేనా? అంటున్నాడు.

ఆ సరే బాబూ. కానీ, అమ్మాయి చదువుకొనుండాలి అంటున్నాడు. వాడే వెతుక్కుంటే, ఏ అమ్మాయి కావాలో మనకెందుకు చెప్పటం?  
iam very simpel and hanest. i have three sister one brother and parent.

want a cooking girl.i am doing postal sarvice and tailor master my original resdence at kalahandi diste.
వీడికి కావాల్సింది వంటమనిషా, ఇంటిమనిషా? ఎందుకో అనుమానంగా ఉంది!   
iam good person. have 2 parents. need good girl. shoud love parents.

caring and to love them. help for them. i love my parents. shoud know cook. education medium.
వీడు ఆలోచనల్లో శ్రవణకుమారుడే, డౌట్ లేదు.

కానీ ఆచరణలో ఆ క్రెడిట్ భార్య ద్వారా కొట్టేద్దామనుకుంటున్నాడు.అమ్మా! తనకి భార్య కావాలన్న తాపత్రయం కంటే, తల్లితండ్రులకి సేవలు చేసే అమ్మాయి కావాలన్న తాపత్రయం కనపడుతోంది.

వీడి భక్తిని శంకించలేం కానీ, ఇలా అడగటం సబబేనా అన్నది ???

అందులోనూ చదువులో డిస్కౌంట్ ఇచ్చాడు.

వంట మాత్రం ఒక్కడు కూడా అడగటం మర్చిపోవట్లా.

కొంపదీసి ఇండియాలో కూడా మగాళ్ళు వంటలు వార్చేస్తున్నారా ఏమిటీ? ఒక్కొక్కడూ తెగ భయపడి చస్తున్నాడు వంట అంటే.  
looking a famili girl. god loving. lot of patence. should take care of me and my famuly well.

she canot go out to working just need to take care home and children after marrage. i have good job so money no issue. i have parents and sister.
వీడు కుండ బద్దలు గొట్టేసి చెబుతున్నాడు, ఇంటిపట్టునే పడుండాలని. అప్పుడే పిల్లల దాకా వెళ్ళిపోయాడు… ఏమిటో …నాకైతే పిచ్చినాన్న ఎక్కడికో వెళ్ళిపోయాడనిపిస్తోంది ….   
ఇదండీ వరస మన పెళ్ళికొడుకులది. పోనీ సత్తెకాలపు వాళ్ళనుకుందామా అంటే, అదీకాదు. అంతర్జాలంలోకొచ్చి మరీ ప్రకటనలిచ్చారే.
వీళ్ళందరికీ "తగిన" భార్యలు ఈ పాటికి దొరికి ఉంటారనే ఆశిద్దాం.
 జై బోలో మేరా భారత్ మహాన్! 

Very nice story Don't Miss to Read it.

An elderly man in Mumbai calls his son in  New York and says,

'I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are getting a divorce; 35 years of marriage... and that much misery is enough!'

'Dad, what are you talking about?' the son screams.

'We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,' the old man says.

'We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in  Hong Kong and tell her!'

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.

'Like heck they're getting divorced,' she shouts, 'I'll take care of this.'

She calls Mumbai immediately, and screams at the old man, 'You are not getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then , don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR??' and she hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife.  'Okay', he says, 'It's all set. They're both coming for Diwali and paying their own airfare!!'
 

MORAL:

No man / woman is busy in this world all 365 days.

The sky is not going to fall down if you take few days LEAVE and meet your dear ones.

OFFICE WORK IS NOT EVERYTHING IN LIFE and MONEY MAKING IS NOT EVERYTHING IN LIFE.

Easy Vs. Difficult

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Bachelors and the Blessed ones..

    Hey!!! All Bachelors and the Blessed ones (Married)for u 2 learn and
    appreciate ........  
     
    The Silent Treatment
    A man and his wife were having some problems at home
    and were giving each other the silent treatment.  
    Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
    he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
    Not wanting to be the first to break the silence(and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
    "Please wake me at 5:00 AM" He left it where he knew she would find it.
    The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
    and he had missed his flight.  Furious, he was about to go and
    see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
    the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
    Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
     
    WIFE VS. HUSBAND
    A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
    An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
    neither of them wanted to concede their position.
    As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
    the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
    "Yep," the wife replied , "in-laws"
     
    WOMEN'S REVENGE
     "Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished
    to purchase.
    As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television
    set in her purse.
    "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
     "No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
    and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."

     
    W O R D S
     A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
    30,000 to a man's 15,000.
       The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat
    everything to men...
    The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"
     
    CREATION
    A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be
    so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
    " The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
    God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
    God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
     
    WHO DOES WHAT
    A man and his wife were having an argument about who
    should brew the coffee each morning.
    The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first,
    and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
    The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and
    you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my
    coffee."
    Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible
    that the man should do the coffee."
    Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
    So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
    and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says
    .........."HEBREWS"

    God may have created man before woman,
    but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

    SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A
    LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT
    .

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    __,_._,___

Good morning

-

Good Morning

I knocked at heavens door today.

God asked: "What can I do for you?"

I said: "Please love, protect & bless the one

reading this"

He smiled & replied: "I already did!"

 

         Keep smiling enjoy the day........

Have a nice day !!!

Sardar Jokes

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1 A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after Every 10 Sec a woman gives Birth to a
Kid. A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.



2 Sardar-why r all these people running?

Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r others running?


3 Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense

Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".


4 Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was not sure as to what to be filled

in column "Salary Expected". After much thought he wrote: Yes!


5 Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant it's already raining. Sardar: So what? Take an umbrella and go.


6 Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer gave 11cr after deducting tax. Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else return my 20 Rs back.


7 Postman:- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This Packet
Sardar:- why did u come so far. Instead u could have posted it....


8 Sardar's wish :when i die,i wana die like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the passengers in the car he was driving..

9 Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art ? Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!


10 Sardar was writing something very slowly. Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly? Sardar: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.

Good Morning

All mornings are like paintings,

U need little inspiration to get going

A smile to brighten it and

A message from someone who cares to colour your day 

Different stages of Love

"Love in the heart was not meant there to stay. Love is not love till you give it away". For love to be ever lasting and eternal every one should be aware of the different stages of love and know its significance. Following are the different phases through which you will travel in your love life and only those who pass it will have an endless love.

 

 

Attraction can be defined as something, which is more than friendship and is a step towards getting ready for a relationship. Now attraction is of two types:

 

 

Physical Attraction - happens when your body reacts to another person. Heart rate increases; temperature rises, palms get sweaty; stomach flutters; throat tightens; etc. This is what will tell you that you are ready for the first contact and also whether you are comfortable in the company of the other person.

 

 

Emotional Attraction - develops next if the circumstances are right. After being drawn to a person physically, you then begin to come closer. If you find you have things in common -- hobbies, ideologies, career, education, or some other common ground -- then an emotional attraction starts to form. Sometimes an emotional attraction can occur even when a physical attraction does not. And in this case, the bond will be stronger between the two who connect, since no preconceived notions based on physical appearance has occurred.

 

 

INTIMACY Intimacy is something, which a person experiences when you learn to trust and believe your lover. It is a close association with another person of the deepest nature. You share you thoughts, feelings, and dreams. You feel free to discuss everything with this person and you are absolutely comfortable in his company. Thus intimacy develops gradually. If you can't establish intimacy with your partner, your relationship may work for a while, but is unlikely to endure throughout the years. Intimacy is actually the path to a true, healthy and beautiful relationship.

 

 

ROMANCE Romance is the essence of a relationship. Without romance your love life will not exist. Romance is the true identity of your love. It brings out your true self and helps you be a better lover, husband and partner. Romance is a celebration of the life you live as part of a couple. It springs naturally and originates from within your heart. It makes you do things that you possibly couldn't have imagined to do otherwise. It shows you who you are and reminds you of the role you play in a relationship. Romance is not responsibility but it is caring about your responsibilities towards your lover and partner. Romance is the appreciation of two people who are celebrating the lucky coincidence that they found each other.

PASSION The third stage is passion, which basically means a desire for another person, which has grown to an intensity that can't be ignored. This is often where an emotional relationship turns into a physical relationship. The passion stage is very important. For from here you will understand the true meaning and nature of your relationship. If there is no passion then its best to let go but if there is passion in your relationship then it is time to go on to the next stage.

 

 

COMMITMENT The last stage is commitment. This is when you know that you want to spend your whole life with this person you love and you can do anything for him. It is when your whole world just revolves round your lover and you take a pledge to remain true to your mate throughout good and bad times, be by his side whenever he needs you.

 

 

Eyes Meet, it is like a Touch...a Spark...Attraction

 

Good morning

 

 

Problems can either make you or break you…
The hammer that breaks glass can shape steel…
It's up to us to be glass or steel…

" Face life brave"
&
"Believe in Best"
Very Good Morning!!!  

  Have a Wonderful Week Ahead

Funny cartoons.....( Just Laugh )

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Cost Cutting Chair .. Daridrapu concept..!!

-

Infosys, TCS & Wipro Guys

One day, three consultants, one from Wipro, one from Infosys and one from TCS, went together for a walk. They were old buddies from b-school, and they were joining together to remember the tough old days they went as students together.

For no apparent reasons, they went into this zoo an passed an elephant.Having worked in the same field and from the same school, of course there is a little bit of peer competition going on between themselves, so when he saw this elephant, an idea clicked the Infosys guy, he said to the others ' Why don't we prove who are the best among ourselves?'. The other two, of course, agreed.

Then the Infosyan said 'Let's make a test. Whoever can make this elephant to laugh, he works for the best firm'. After they all agreed, they started. Being a pure logical strategist, the Infosyan tried to make the elephant laugh by telling jokes. Of course it stayed still... As a more practical consultant, the Wipro guy tried to make funny gestures... and the elephant still stayed still.... Now, comes the TCS guy.. Being the practical guy he was always told to be, he whispered something to the elephant, and it laughed at him while pointing its fingers to him...

The other two were astonished. How come this TCS guy be able to beat them? So the Wipro guy said 'OK, let's make another test. Let's make this elephant cry !!'. So there they went again, practicing the same method as before. The Infosys guy told sad sad stories, the Wipro guy made sad gestures, and they fail again......

Then, the TCS guy whispered something again to the elephant's ear and it just cried, weeping.....and patting the TCS guy's shoulder.
This cannot be, thought the other two. So the Infosyan said 'OK, you've won twice. If you can win this test, we will bow to you. Let's make this elephant run'. He went and bark to the elephant orders to run.Of course, it stayed still .... The Wipro guy pushes the elephant and stab it with stake to make it run, it stayed still. So...our TCS guy come to it and whispered something again to it's ear and the elephant run and run as fast as it could, as if it was scared to death.

The other two surrendered. They say 'OK, you're the best pal. You work for a very good firm, tell us your secret'.
'Well' said the TCS guy, 'the first time I made it laugh, I said I work for TCS'.
' When I made it cry as if it were very sad and patted me, I told the elephant how much I get paid'.
' And when I made it run scared to death, I said to it, Why don't you join TCS?

Three Engineers

Three engineers are riding in a car -- an electrical engineer, a chemical engineer, and a Microsoft engineer.

The car suddenly stalls and stops by the side of the road. The three engineers look at each other with bewilderment, wondering what could be wrong.

The electrical engineer, not knowing much about mechanics, suggests, 'Let's strip down the electronics of the car and try to trace where a fault might have occurred.'

The chemical engineer, not knowing much about electronics, suggests, 'Maybe the fuel has become emulsified and is causing a blockage somewhere in the system.'

The Microsoft engineer suggests, 'Why don't we close all the windows, get out, get back in, open the windows again, and maybe it will work after Restart.

AwesomE~~~ That's called Gooogly (Brain Teasers)

Recently Procter & Gamble India had participated in IIM-Bangalore' s
Placement Sessions. They asked some interesting questions to students during
recruitment.
 
Here are some of them:-
************ ********* ********* ***
1. There is one word in the English language that is alway pronounced
incorrectly. What is it?
 
2. A man gave one son 10 cents and another son was given 15 cents. What time
is it?
 
3. A boat has a ladder that has six rungs, each rung is one foot apart. The
bottom rung is one foot from the water. The tide rises at 12 inches every 15
minutes. High tide peaks in one hour. When the tide is at it's highest, how
many rungs are under water?
 
4. There is a house with four walls. Each wall faces south. There is a
window in each wall. A bear walks by one of the windows. What color is the
bear?
 
5. Is half of two plus two equal to two or three?
 
6. There is a room. The shutters are blowing in. There is broken glass on
the floor. There is water on the floor. You find Sloppy dead on the floor.
Who is Sloppy? How did Sloppy die?
 
7. How much dirt would be in a hole 6 feet deep and 6 feet wide that has
been dug with a square edged shovel?
 
8. If I were in Hawaii and dropped a bowling ball in a bucket of water which
is 45 degrees F, and dropped another ball of the same weight, mass, and size
in a bucket at 30 degrees F, both of them at the same time, which ball would
hit the bottom of the bucket first? Same question, but the location is in
Canada ?
 
9. What is th e significance of the following: The year is 1978, thirty-four
minutes past noon on May 6th.
 
10. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other
field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in the
center field?
 
11. What is it that goes up and goes down but does not move?
 
Scroll down for answers..... ........
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1. The word "incorrectly. "
 
2. 1:45. The man gave away a total of 25 cents. He divided it between two
people. Therefore, he
gave a quarter to two.
 
3. None, the boat rises with the tide. Googly ;-)
 
4. White. If all the walls face south, the house is at the North pole, and
the bear, therefore, is a polar bear.
 
5. Three. Well, it seems that it could almost be either, but if you follow
the mathematical orders of operation, division is performed before addition.
So... half of two is one. Then add two, and the answer is three.
 
6. Sloppy is a (gold)fish. The wind blew the shutters in, which knocked his
goldfish-bowl off the table, and it broke, killing him.
 
7. None. No matter how big a hole is, it's still a hole: the absence of
dirt.
 
8. Both questions, same answer: the ball in the bucket of 45 degree F water
hits the bottom of the bucket last. Did you think that the water in the 30
degree F bucket is frozen? Think again. The question said nothing about that
bucket having anything in it. Therefore, there is no water (or ice) to slow
the ball down...
 
9. The time and month/date/year American style calendar are 12:34, 5/6/78.
 
10. One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big stack.
 
11. The temperature.

After First Night

A young man gets married. After the first night, his friends ask him,
'Hey, how was the night bhai? Somehow you look slightly worried.'

Replied young man 'Oh, everything went fine and I had a very nice time.
But at the end, out of habit I gave her Rs.1000!'

'Forget it man, anyway she is your wife and money will be with you
only', consoled friends.

'Yeah, that is true. But what worried me is the fact that she
immediately returned Rs.200!'

Stunning Sunset And Sunrise Photos

-

Small Story

An old man, a boy, and a donkey were on their way to town. The boy was riding the donkey.

As they went along, they passed a goup of people who remarked it was a shame the old man had to walk while the young boy was riding. The man and boy thought about the criticism and decided maybe the people were right, so they switched places.

Later they passed another group of people who remarked that it was a shame that the old man made the little boy walk. The two travelers decided that they would BOTH walk.

Soon they passed a third group of people who said they were stupid to walk , when they had such a fine donkey to ride. So, the two decided they would both ride the donkey.

The next group of people they passed said that it was AWFUL that the two put such a heavy load on the poor donkey. The old man & boy thought that maybe the people were right, so they decided to carry the donkey.

Soon they came to a river, with a narrow bridge spanning it. As they attempted to cross the bridge, they lost their grip on the animal & it fell into the river and drowned.

The moral of the story ? You Can't Please Everyone

Telangana Rhymes - very funny rhymes

English: Johnny Johnny Yes papa
Eating Sugar No papa
Telling lies no papa
Open your mouth ha ha ha

Telangana Telugu: Johnny ga oh.. Johnny ga..
Endhi naina Shekkar Bukkinava ra.. ledhu naina
abaddalu adutunnava ra munda koduka
noru teruvara lambidi koduka

English: Jack and Jill went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water
jack fell down and broke
his crown jill came tumbling down.

Telangana Telugu: jack gaadu jill gaadu konda ku poyinru
gaadi ki poyi neellu testunte jack
gaadu kinda padi
moothi bokkal saap chesu kundu
jill gaadu dil khush toni panduga cheskunnadu

SardarJi

1. What is Common between : Krishna, Ram, Gandhiji & Jesus..?
A: Sardar ji Replied : All are Born on Government Holidays.

2. Ek aadmi ki Biwi gum ho gayi, Waha RAM ke Mandir me gaya, Ram ne kaha Baju wale Hanuman Ke Mandir mai ja, Meri bhi usi ne dhundhi thi.

3. Sardar bought a new mobile. He called everyone from his Phone Book & said "My Mobile No. has changed Earlier it was Nokia 3310 Now it is 6610"

4. Santa : I am a Proud Sardar, My son is in Medical College.
Banta : Really, what is he studing, Santa : No is not studying, they are Studying him.

Money Isn't Everything

-

How guys select the girl

How guys select the girl they want to marry




A man is dating three women and wants to decide which to marry.



He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of
$5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.



The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon,
gets her hair done, purchases new make-up and buys several new outfits, and dresses up very nicely for the man.



She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him
because she loves him so much.



The man is impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts.



She gets him a new set of STRONG golf clubs, some new gizmos for
his computer, and some expensive clothes.As she presents these gifts,
she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves
him so much.



Again, the man is impressed.



The third invests the money in the stock market.



She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000
and reinvests the remainder in a joint account.



She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she
loves him so much.



Obviously, the man was impressed.



The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done
with the money.



Guess which lady he chose to marry?



Think like a man . . .



(scroll down for the answer)



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He married the most beautiful one!!!!!!



Men are Men.... Obviously!!!

*******

DO U KNOW WE CAN CREATE A FOLDER WITHOUT ANY NAME?

Folders without any name.

This trick will allow you to create files and folders without any name.

Just follow the following steps:


1.Select file,press F2.

2.Hold alt key and type 0160 from the numpad.

3.Release the alt key.Now without doing anything else,again hold alt key and press 0160.

4.Press enter and you will have a nameless folder/file

5.Repeat step 3 to create as many nameless files or folders in the same directory.

Note:Type the numbers 0160 from the numpad,that is,the numbers present on the right side of the keyboard.Dont type the numbers which are present on top of the character keys.

The Parrot

A woman went to a pet shop & immediately

spotted a large, beautiful parrot.

There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00.

"Why so little," she asked the pet store owner.

The owner looked at her and said,

"Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a house of Prostitution

and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff."

The woman thought about this, but decided

she had to have the bird any way.

She took it home and hung the bird's cage up

in her living room and waited for it to say something.

The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said,


"New house, new madam."

The woman was a bit shocked at the implication,

but then thought "that's really not so bad."

When her 2 teenage daughters returned from school

the bird saw and said,

"New house, new madam, new girls."

The girls and the woman were a bit offended

but then began to laugh about the situation

considering how and where the parrot had been raised.

Moments later, the woman's husband Keith

came home from work.

The bird looked at him and said,



"Hi, Keith!"

Kids in school think quick

TEACHER    :    Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA       :    Here it is!
TEACHER    :    Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS        :    Maria!
______________________________ _____________________________

TEACHER     :    Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK        :    Because of the sign.
TEACHER     :    What sign?
FRANK        :    The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
______________________________ _____________________________
TEACHER :  John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN     :   You told me to do it without using tables!
______________________________ _____________________________

TEACHER    :   Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN       :    K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER    :    No, that's wrong
GLENN       :    Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
______________________________ _____________________________
TEACHER    :    Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD      :    H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER   :    What are you talking about?
DONALD    :    Yesterday you said it's H to O!
______________________________ _____________________________

TEACHER   : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't  have ten years ago.
WINNIE    :    Me!
______________________________ _____________________________
TEACHER  :    Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS          :    Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
______________________________ ____________________________
TEACHER    :    Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE      :    I is...
TEACHER    :    No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE      :    All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
______________________________ _____________________________
TEACHER    :    Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO        :     Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
_________

Check your school/college photo

This is brilliant I couldn't believe it, check it out. This Website is amazing. They actually have photographs of almost
every School in the World. Unless you went to School when cameras weren't invented, you will find a photo of yourself or at
least your classmates. Click on the link below or type it into your search line. You have to enter the name of your school and
Year that you were there. Give it a go.....
>
> >
>
> > http://www.worldschoolphotographs.com/wsp/index1.htm

Jokes

Girlfriend: And are you sure you love me and no one else?

Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday

*********

Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?

Customer: What other colors do you have?

*********

Manager: Sorry, but I can't give u a job. I don't need much help.

Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in
this case. You see, I won't be of much help anyway!!

*********

Dad: Son, what do u want for ur birthday?

Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.

*********

Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!

Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.

*********

Diner: You'll drive me to my grave!

Waiter: Well, you don't expect to walk there, do you?

*********

Husband: U know, wife, our son got his brain from me.

Wife: I think he did, I've still got mine with me!

*********

Man: Officer! There's a bomb in my garden!

Officer: Don't worry. If no one claims it within three days, you can
keep it.

*********

Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!

Son: That's why I say she's no good!

*********

Puzzle for smart people

I am sending this only to my smart friends.
I could not figure it out and had to look at the answer.
See if you can figure out what these words have in common.

Banana

Dresser

Grammar

Potato

Revive

Uneven

Assess



Are you peeking or have you already given up?

Give it another try.


Look at each word carefully.

(You'll kick yourself when you discover the answer.)

This is Cool!

>

>

>

>


>


>


>


>



Answer:
No, it is not that they all have at least 02 double letters.


Answer:
In all of the words listed,
If you take the first letter,
Place it at the end of the word,
And
Then, spell the word backwards,
It will be the same word.

Did you figure it out?

Wasted suicide by sardar

A blonde, socially ridiculed decided to hang herself from a tree in the park and commit suicide.

A little bit later, an old lady walked around noticed her hanging from the rope and swinging.


She asked her what she was doing and if she needed any help.

The blonde firmly replied, "I am committing suicide by hanging."


The old lady says, "You are doing it wrong sweetie, put the noose around your neck not the Waist."

The blonde responses, "Ya giving me trouble again, I tried that, "but I could not breathe."

Not a Joke -- Just funny

Just click on the link below, click on play, then leave the mouse alone.

Then sit back and enjoy a piece of IT creative brilliance.

Somebody spent A LOT of time here!!

Click Here

--
******************************************************

-------------------------------------------------
Don't judge a person by the way he speaks.....
Judge him by the way he cares for you....
Because care is the outcome of true love....
****************************************************** http://www.venkatmails.blogspot.com/

When ever I think about you a star falls from the sky!!!!
So one day if you find the sky empty don't blame me....
I can't stop thinking about you......

Can you read this in first attempt????

..

.

.

..

.

.

...
.

.

.

.
.
.
Close your eyes almost 90% so that you can actually read it.
Its really superb!!!!
--
-------------------------------------------------
Don't judge a person by the way he speaks.....
Judge him by the way he cares for you....
Because care is the outcome of true love....
******************************************************

Will Power

An old man lived alone in Minnesota. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work.


His only son, who would have helped him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his situation.


Dear Son, I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant  my potato garden this year.


I hate to miss doing the garden, because your mother always loved planting time. I'm just getting too old to  be digging up a  garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot  for me, if you weren't in prison.                                                              


Love, Dad

 .........

 Shortly, the old man received this telegram:


"For Heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up the garden!! That's where I buried the GUNS!"    At  4a.m.


The next morning,


A dozen FBI agents and local police officers showed up and dug up the entire garden without finding any guns.


Confused, the old man wrote another note to his son telling him what happened, and asked him what to do next.

His son's reply was: "Go ahead and plant your  potatoes, Dad. It's the best I could do for you from here."

 


********
Moral Of the Story
NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE IN THE WORLD,
IF YOU HAVE DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING DEEP FROM YOUR HEART, YOU CAN DO IT.
IT IS THE THOUGHT THAT MATTERS NOT WHERE YOU ARE OR WHERE THE PERSON IS.

--
******************************************************
When ever I think about you a star falls from the sky!!!!
So one day if you find the sky empty don't blame me....
I can't stop thinking about you......
-------------------------------------------------

Don't judge a person by the way he speaks.....
Judge him by the way he cares for you....
Because care is the outcome of true love....
******************************************************

Sardar bought a new computer and he wrote this complaint letter (Funny) to BillGates

letter written to bill gates from Sardar
This is the letter written to bill gates from Sardar from Punjab

Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

This letter is from Sardar from Punjab. We have bought a computer for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ****** appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but we face this problem only in password field. We checked with hardware vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard. Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****. I request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password is.

2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the 'shut down ' button.

3. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request you to check this.

4. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friend clicked 'run ' has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so that we can click that by sitting.

5. One doubt is that any 're-scooter' available in system? As I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.

6. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ' find', but unable to trace. Is it a bug??

7. Every night I am not sleeping as I have to protect my 'mouse' from CAT, So I suggest u to provide one DOG to kill that cat.

8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning 'HEARTS' (playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to collect ur
money.

9. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when u will provide that?

Best regards,
Sardar

World's Largest Liger(Lion+Tiger)

Hello, Know what's a Liger? It's a cross breed of a Lion male and Tiger female... Read on...... The 10ft Liger who's still growing... He looks like something from a prehistoric age or a fantastic creation from Hollywood . But Hercules is very much living flesh and blood - as he proves every time he opens his gigantic mouth to roar. Part lion, part tiger, he is not just a big cat but a huge one, standing 10ft tall on his back legs. Called a liger, in reference to his crossbreed parentage, he is the largest of all the cat species. On a typical day he will devour 20lb of meat, usually beef or chicken, and is capable of eating 100lb at a single setting. At just three years old, Hercules already weighs half a ton. He is the accidental result of two enormous big cats living close together at the Institute of Greatly Endangered and Rare Species, in Miami, Florida , and already dwarfs both his parents. "Ligers are not something we planned on having," said institute owner Dr Bhagavan Antle. "We have lions and tigers living together in large enclosures and at first we had no idea how well one of the lion boys was getting along with a tiger girl, then loo and behold we had a liger."

Quotes

In life we have a lot to lose and very little to choose....
When ever you get a chance to choose, do it wisely and
see that you will never lose what you choose......


You may miss me... You may ignore me.... You may even forget me....
But one day if you want to see me, don't search, just see your shadow... I will be there...


Some people make you laugh and some make you cry....
When you have the heart to forget the people who make you laugh,
why can't you forget the people who make you cry??? Life is indeed strange.....



Life is a journey, were you meet many on the way...
some may come near your heart and some not....
But never be emotionaly involved, you will never
know when you have to walk alone.....


When ever I think about you a star falls from the sky!!!!
So one day if you find the sky empty don't blame me....
I can't stop thinking about you......


Don't judge a person by the way he speaks.....
Judge him by the way he cares for you....
Because care is the outcome of true love....

Enthusiastic Salesman ....JOKE

A new vacuum cleaner salesman knocked on the door on the first house of the street. A tall lady answered the door.



Before she could speak, the enthusiastic salesman barged into the living room and opened a big black plastic bag and poured all the cow droppings onto the carpet.



" Madam, if I could not clean this up with the use of this new powerful vacuum cleaner, I will EAT all this s...!" exclaimed the eager salesman.




"Do you need chilli sauce or ketchup with that?" asked the lady.



The bewildered salesman asked, " Why, madam?"



"There's no electricity in the house..." said the lady


**********


MORAL: Gather All resources be4 working on any project...!!!

Some Interesting and some FUNNY Facts

Of animals:::
It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
A snail can sleep for three years.
All polar bears are left-handed.
Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants.
The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
Butterflies taste with their feet.
Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.
On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.
The human body ::
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
Women blink nearly twice as much as men!
You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.
It is impossible to lick your elbow.
People say, "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for a millisecond.
If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different
Of words
The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start with.
The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.
Miscellaneous ::
Miscellaneous
Q: What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser printers all have in common?
A: All invented by women.
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
Q: This is the only food that doesn't spoil. What is this?
A: Honey
The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.