Sardar Collections - 3

INDO-PAK WAR


Once in the Indo Pakistan war, Pakistan was fighting fiercely and
capturing everything in sight. A sikh camp called Gurudwara hideout was
crucial to defend from the pakistanis as it contained all the defence
secrets.
The pakistani forces surrounded the base and the
sikhs had thought that they had lost the battle but, suddenly out of
the bushes jumps Cptn. Hari Singh wearing a Maachar dani! (mosquito net)
He Pulls out his AK-47 rifle and fires like mad. The pakistanis run off
quickly.
The next day Hari Singh gets a medal. His freinds ask him "Yaar thu
maachar
daani kyon pehenke gaya tha?" Hari Singh replies
"Maachar daani itni patli hote hain ki agar maachar nahin ghus sakte,
goli kahan se ghussenghi?
In the following war Hari Singh retires and his son Gani Singh (No
Assumptions Please!) joins the army. Pakistanis are again surrounding
the Gurudwara hideout, the sikhs again think they've lost the war but
out of the bushes erupts Gani Singh wearning nothing he tries do shoo
away the pakistanis like his father did but instead gets shot. In the
hospital his friends tell him "aare yaar, therre bap me tho itni akal
thi ki vo maachar daani pehin ke gaya tha, aur tu nunga chale gaya" Gani
Singh replies "aare yaar main tho Mosquito repelling cream lage ke gaya tha"!


*****

Professor Sardar



Sardar Singh was very keen on doing his Ph.D. He was in search of a
subject on which no one did any research before!

As he was thinking over it, he found a cockroach on the table in from
of him. He decided instantly to do a research on the roach.

He picked the roach and put it in the centre of the table and said:
"Run". The roach ran.
He pulled out one leg of the roach, put it again in the centre of the
table and said: "Run". The roach ran.

He pulled one more leg of the roach, put it again in the centre of the
table and said: "Run". The roach ran. This way the roach tried to run
even when it had just one leg.

He pulled last leg of the roach, put it again in the centre of the
table and said: "Run". The roach could not!

Our Professor was satisfied with his study and started writing his
thesis: "When you pull out all the legs of a roach, it cannot hear
anymore".

****

Sardarji in Outer Space!


Two dogs, Rubi and Moti, and a Sardarji were sent to the outer space.

The ground control issues commands
"Rubi!"
"Woof!"
"Press the red button."
"Woof! Woof!"

"Moti!"
"Woof!"
"Press the white button."
"Woof! Woof!"

"Sardarji!"
"Woof."
"Stop barking, feed the dogs and don't touch anything

*****

HEIGHTS OF REVENGE



Talking about those days when there were no mosquito repellents and we
had to spend sleepless nights. Sardarji was also experiencing the same
every time he tries to sleep, one mosquito comes and disturbs his sleep with a sound
"guooonn, guooonn." He gets very irritated. He tries to cover his ear but the
problem remains persistent. Ultimately he gets up and catches the
mosquito in his hand. He is very kind and not for the blood shed but still wanted to
take revenge. Happy as he is now starts singing a lullaby and says "so ja machchar,
bete so ja". After some time he finds the mosquito falling in to deep
sleep in his hands. So he goes near it and says "Guoooonnnnn,
guoooonnnnn."

****

Deserted Island



Three men were stranded on an uninhabited island. One was Hindu, one a Muslim, and the other a Surd. The only way back home was to swim 100 miles to the next island, which was inhabited.

The Muslim was so determined to get home that he tried to swim. He made it 50 miles, got tired, and drowned.

Then the Hindu tried. He made it 75 miles, but got tired and drowned, too.

The Sardar thought he could make it all the way, so he started swimming. He swam 50 miles, but started getting tired, so he swam all the way back to the island.

****

Just a little Bit

Travelling together once were a Russian, an American & the saviour of our
nation - Sardarji!!!
Each of them wanted to prove that their country was the greatest.
Said the Russian, " We have a rocket that could touch the sky." "We
dont believe it ",said the others.
"Ok! Ok! but just 2cms. below the sky"
Not to be out done the American said, " We have a submarine that can
touch the ocean-bed of the deepest part on this planet."
"We don't believe it ",said the others.
"Ok! Ok! but just 2cms. above the ocean-bed"
Our hero with a smile on his face said, "In our country we all eat
with our nose!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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I may not be perfect at what to do but perfect at what not to do!
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